Skipping Cinco De Mayo

My impatience has really gotten the better of me this time. I had it all planned out to get dressed up and go out for mexican food for Cinco De Mayo - tomorrow. But the longer i thought about it, the more I wanted mexican food. Yesterday. So here i am on May 4th, getting dressed up and going out for mexican food. My impatience is overwhelming and my selfcontrol is lacking greatly. But at least i can say that my stomach will be satisfied. I can't stop thinking about fried icecream and chips with salsa. Not together, of course.

School closes in two weeks. And I don't mean that it closes it's doors for the summer, I mean that school. closes. No more ministry classes, no more walking to chapel in the snow, no more standing in the bathroom for ten minutes before class starts because that's where the hot air is blasting, no more Dr. Barcalow in funny bowties or jokes about "Harris Classes", this is it, this is the end, the finale is here. And as we flip the pages of the book, drawing closer to the end of the chapter, I do what I have always done. I read slower. I feel like i'm dragging my heels in the sand, being pulled kicking and screaming through these last few weeks. My head hurts from the work that we're being bogged down with, and while i would really love for the endless list of presentations to cease, i would much more like for school to continue.
My heart is breaking for Taylor University Fort Wayne. I know all the cheesy answers to how we're dealing with this; God brought us here for a reason, it's a diaspora, we're going out into the world to impact other people, God has a plan for us. And yet, despite all that reassurance, I still feel like this is wrong. I still feel burdened by the abruptness, and I worry that no one will know I'm a Christian if I don't have a Youth Ministry label on the front of my shirt.
Is it legitimate to wonder if people will still know that I'm a Christian? Did I base this knowledge off of my major? I AM a Christian, in spite of or because of or irrelevantly connected to, my youth ministry major, but I AM a Christian in every context beyond school. But my fear is that it's an easy out. Does this mean that I have to start living my life sold out for God? (not to mention that i most definitely should have been doing that from the beginning) but does this mean that I really have to Change now? Before, I could tell people where I go to school and what i'm majoring in and where i work, and all of a sudden without having to show them how I live my life, they know who I am, what I believe in, and where i'm coming from. Now, i don't have that little cheat sheet to hand out to people. Now, they'll have to know because of how i live.
And THAT, my friends, is a little scary.